juxtapose

here are 10 things that i don't quite understand, until today:

1. star wars/trek
2. amateur sex video caught on handphone cameras
3. having a myspace account
   
4. girls and their love for cameras and narcissistic pictures
   
5. muslim dads drinking in front of their young kids
6. the pay of the starbucks' partners
7. singapore's ambition to be in the world cup in 2010
8. motorists who do not prominently show the p-plate on their vehicle
   
9. singaporeans who are kiasu
10. poly students do not enjoy the same privileges as jc students

derby

if the middle east has the israelis and the palestines, north asia has north and south korea, then the south east asia can offer singapore and malaysia. whenever the national football teams of these two countries meet, it's not just a football match. it's war.

the soldiers of the red army of singapore turned out in full force armed with their umbrellas to shield themselves against the rain and epok-epok as their ration to keep their stomachs full while spuring on the 11 men on the battlezone trying to win the war and do their country proud. after ninety minutes of fierce fighting the score was level and it boiled down to penalty shootouts. this is russian roulette at it's least mercy. in the end, it was our country's flag that was flying high. it's a sad trip back up north in the bus kilangs for our neighbours.

the moral of the story is, kalau tak boleh, jangan cakap boleh. tengok ape jadi.

happy bird-day

first we went to starbucks and there were no seats available nor free drinks

coffeebean did just that for us.

i can't fucking wait to fuck off from fucking SP. i miss someone already but i just don't want to lose the bet. the outcome is just too enticing! =)

i told mum i don't want to get married because it will just cost too much. i'd rather use the money and buy a house and car. so she said that's because i haven't met the right girl. i think that is so true because when do i find the right girl, i'll make her buy me the house and car.

my new year's resolution is to stop hating and looking at girls as sex objects and sources of income.

SEA

south east asia gives me the image of a diverse multi-racial region made up of a varse number of religions and cultures. it ranges from the tribes people on the hillsides of thailand who put rings on their necks to men in business suits and ties in shenton way in singapore. this is also a region where there is much difference between the neighbouring countries but surprisingly although tensions might be high sometimes, the countries will never fail to provide aid when one of their neighbours' require them.

in the poorer countries, the industry is mainly an agricultural one. people live on farms and their produce is their livelihood. they face poverty daily and their children can't be afford to be sent to schools to get a decent education. it is in countries like these that development is very stagnant. one of the reasons is because the country is too large, like indonesia or because of the many years of civil war that they faced in the past, they are behind the other nations. whereas in smaller and more peaceful countries such as singapore, everyone will get an education to the extent that is no longer to just get an education. people in singapore are competing to be the best of the best in the country as well as around the world. therefore as you can see from here the mentality of the people in these two countries are very contrasting.

in the more developed countries, the citizens tend to be more westernised. they are surrounded by buildings everywhere they go. those people living in the less developed countries live in the countryside where lush greenery is seen everywhere. this is why south east asia is probably one of the best choices for a holiday. one moment you can be shopping in the busy streets of bangkok shopping and the next you can be by the white sandy beaches of patong beach phuket. it is also safe to say that south east asians have alot of respect for their customs. the people are very civilised and have alot of morality in them.

although it may seem that south east asia is a jovial and prospering region, we cannot ignore the fact that it is plagued by many problems such as AIDS and piracy. much is being done to curb these two with the backing of the other nations in the region. sometimes due to mother nature, a natural disaster may occur in this part of the world, especially earthquakes. when such a catastrophy occurs, without fail the other countries will lend a hand as much as they can such as providing basic necessities to search and rescue.

till then, to sum up what south east asia means to me, it is a concoction of different everythings that co-exist together to give you a something that you will take with you forever, and be proud to be part of it.

albert hammond junior - back to the 101

he actually looks like my friend's dad. cock scratcher and i always call him 'bapak farid'.

the deadliest knot

do people get married because of other reasons except love? i'm sure there are. those young women can't possibly marry rich men on the verge of sleeping forever because of love. oh wait they do. they love their husband's money, not their husband.

i can't imagine myself getting married. imagine all that responsibility and faithfulness! right now if i were to get married, is because i want my own flesh and blood to bury me when i go six feet under. i don't want to spend my last days on earth in an old folks home and then being burried by strangers. not that i reject having my funeral held by strangers, but i feel that the least that any human being can have during his last moments on earth is to have an honourable burial. i definitely want a proper funeral. if i had a wife, or wives and kids, they can organise my funeral for me. i'll also probably die in my own house, my own home. in addition when i die, my family can pray for their beloved father and husband. that's important.

till then, i should start praying myself before people pray for me.

kings

everyone knows that football is a lucrative business. in view of this please exclude the s-league and other leagues from third world countries. the top players in europe earn as little as S$50,000 a week and have supermodels as their girlfriends and some of these players are so ugly, for example david beckham. considering the fact that majority of them only learned up to simultaneous equation in school, this is a hell alot of valuable pieces of paper with people's faces on them. furthermore, all they do everyday is just kick balls around with the occasional sprints here and there.

for once i felt what it's like to be earning $10 per half hour. unfortunately no supermodel is involved here. so what's the story morning glory? well my friends and i went to our school's street soccer court to play football. upon our arrival we realised that there was this really pathetic and mediocre tournament going on. imagine this, we saw people playing with jeans and slippers. so you wonder how many teams there are? three. therefore my friend asked if we could join and we were welcomed with open arms. after thrashing all the teams we emerged as winners, easy peasy. half an hour later after entering the tournament fpr free, our team walked away with a $50 Nike voucher. oh my goodness i have been winning countless numbers of vouchers during my 3 year stint in sp. i'm not surprised when i'm a working adult my salary will be in terms of vouchers, like NTUC vouchers, PUB vouchers, SMRT vouchers etc. being so sick and tired of these pieces of paper which doesn't have yusok ishak's face on them, i exchanged the voucher for $10 with my friend.

it feels good earning twice of what i'm earning an hour at starbucks for just half an hour's worth of sweat and orgasm. just for the record, singapore's national football team sucks to the extent that it should be disbanded and the funds from the fas should be donated to develop void deck football. hey, wayne rooney and thierry henry played on the streets as kids. look where they are now. so don't call the fucking cops when you see the kids playing at your void deck! we want to go to the world cup in 3 years time.

we were so close we could smell his armpits

i hope this makes you jealous

i hope you're more jealous now

you should have just paid $87 two months ago

now you wish you were there too

supermassive assholes and revelations

the muse concert was supermassive. to all you fucking losers out there who didn't manage to go, too bad. you missed out on the pushing and shoving, the jumping around, the chics and the music. muse gave the sweaty and ecstatic crowd a world class performance. the crowd got their money's worth and muse went away worth half a million dollars more. when we arrived the queue was like a snaking great wall of china. but then they opened another queue and we managed to get very near to the front. so far in front that one of the KGB was standing at the barricades slowly becoming breathless. after a while he couldn't take it and tapped out. the security helped him out and he was saved.

one thing which i clearly remember during the concert was me helping this really damn pretty girl who tripped because of all the pushing. before she fell to the ground, your hero here grabbed her by the arm and saved her. she thanked me since i saved her from a bunch of raving savages. =)

valuable lessons learnt from the concert are always keep a lookout for one another and never wear $70 slippers to such gigs.

it was a night well spent.

FINALLY

after alot of talk and a million changes along the way, we've finally booked ourselves a flight to Phuket!

Muse's concert is on tuesday and it better be worth my $87. i hope it won't rain too.

hello Skype

X-Nitraz's biggest fans

i can forsee that sooner or later, Skype will overtake MSN Messenger and be the most used chatting program. im starting to prefer Skype over MSN Messenger already.

by the way, i am Combat Fit for ALL operational vocations. MAJULAH SINGAPURA! right.

minus one

the topic for today is transvestites or trannies for short. the thing about them that bothers me is why did they go through the sex change? one reason i presume is that they are brought up in an environment which is very heavily influenced by feminism. perhaps in their family, all of his siblings are girls and he grows up playing dolls and masak-masak with his sisters. in addition, if he comes from a very poor family, it's possible that he wears his sisters' clothes. all in all, after many years of living in such an environment, he develops female-like behavior. before you know it, he can't be helped anymore and he decides to undergo a sex change.

one more reason i can think of is that they are born that way. the saying 'God made them that way' is quite commonly heard. to support this fact, the Oprah Winfrey show interviewed these two small boys who are less than five years of age. it was shocking to hear that these two boys, they aren't related by the way, have blatantly admitted that he feels that he's a girl, and he wants to get his penis removed. they don't do things that ordinary boys would do. but instead, they play with dolls. their parents have done their best in persuading them that they are boys but to no avail.

in conclusion i feel that we shouldn't shun away these transvestites but instead, try to be a tad more open towards them. i'm not hinting that we should invite them into our lives or anything of that sort. just pretend that they're normal people if you happen to see them. don't give them that 'look', stare at them for ages or worse still start calling them names . they're human beings, they have feelings and they want to lead their own lives too. unless they start bothering you first, like try to hit on you, then it's time to play mean. other than that if they mind their own business, we mind ours too.

5 cessnas and 2 piper warriors

take a look at the people who will keep the planes up and flying in the future. joyride anyone?

so do looks matter? i think to a majority of the male population, starting from boys who've just reached puberty to dato' k, it does to a large extent. the only reasons i can think of are wanting to have a very presentable looking bitch so that you can show off to everyone that if the-biggest-problem-in-your-life was to get laid it'll probably be the time of your life and not forgetting bragging rights; your woman is better than theirs.

how come looks do not really matter to girls then? well maybe to them what's important is that the dickhead's a nice person. but i dare say a small group of girls choose money over looks. it doesn't matter if you're balding and have a beer belly as long as your money flows like the amazon river.

therefore with regards to the picture above, we might look like gays, horse racing punters or salesmen but mark my words, we will definitely do an excellent job!

msn

lil jon and s jibeng having some fun on msn's video call